I am back in Atlanta this week. I did not get to travel in December, due schedule issues, family medical issues, and of course the holidays.
I missed the camaraderie of my team here, and the change of scenery I regularly enjoy for a couple days once a month. It has been a good trip so far, as I got to meet some new team mates, visit with some old team mates, and talk with people I have not had a chance to lately.
I am 2 days into this trip, with 2 more to go before I get home. As good as the trip has been, I miss seeing and talking to my kids every day. I guess this is a little bit of a foreshadowing of what its like when kids leave home for college or to their own place as adults. Things get a bit quiet, and they don’t need you as often, or as much. Even if this is the normal pattern in life, it does leave a hollow pit in me, as I realize the truth that my children will grow up, get independent, and leave. I hope that I have done enough and they have seen enough to know how much I have always loved them and care for them, and how much I want them to live their dreams. All I can do is hold hope about this and try to express it to them when I am with them. It seems unlikely that I will know for sure if I have done well as a father until they have launched into their own lives, begun to chase their dreams, and decide for themselves how much a part of their lives I will be.